When was the last time you came? Like, really hard? And with a partner, at that?
What may sound like a simple answer to some, has many searching deep within themselves to remember a time that their partner was able to get them off in the most explosive of ways. Sadly enough, this lack of partnered-play satisfaction happens to many female-identifying folks the world over.
We’ve all been witness to the seemingly common “faking it” trope that has been a long-held theme in pop culture (think Sally’s quintessential table-slapping, sliding down the chair, hair flipping diner orgasm in When Harry Met Sally, which garners the notable “I’ll have what she’s having” response). The point of that whole scene is to make the case that an orgasm can be faked in order to satisfy the person you’re sleeping with.
But where is the logic in misleading someone else? Especially someone you’ve allowed to revel in the glory that is your pussy. How does this help you or your partner to deny yourself the ACTUAL pleasure of getting off? You end up looking a fool for being dishonest, and your partner is left in the dark thinking they’re banking in on those O’s time and again. Let’s be real — you’re too afraid to admit that you are refusing to take your pleasure into your own hands. And thus, you don’t find your pleasure worth it.
Well, you can just STOP. Stop it right now. Your pleasure is your birthright. OWN IT.
It is YOUR responsibility to attain that pleasure — not anyone’s else’s. You can cry me all the fucking rivers you want about your partner not being able to “find it” or the sex being less than desirable. But, when it all cums down to it — and I do mean CUM — it is you, my slutty friend, that needs to be accountable for what, how, with whom, and when you get off. Your partner is not a mind reader. Nor is it up to them alone to try to find what sends you off. You are the one that needs to direct your partner on the path to blissful release. Being able to vocalize your wants, needs, and desires is an extremely important part of embodying your sexual power, and in having a satisfying sex life with yourself and, thus, with others. This is the definition of sexual agency. It is you that holds the key.
So, how do we hone that power? Getting in touch with yourself. And I mean really getting to know yourself. Discover your pleasure spots, erogenous zones, what gets you going and flying high. Give yourself some lovin’, girl! Once you are able to determine where and how you like to be touched, you can then share your findings with your partner. And trust me, any person that wants to learn you and takes the time to truly know your inner (and outer) workings is one worth keeping around. The rest can literally fuck off.
With that, explore away. Go deep. Go hard. Get nasty. The more you know how to make yourself see God, the better equipped you will be to offer your partners the same insight. They deserve at least that knowing. And you deserve ALL the pleasure.
Cum one, cum all.